Considering where I've come from and where I'm going.
There is this eternal expectation I place upon myself to become better; to put it nicely, I don't feel satisfied with my life. Who's fault is that? My own. There is a deep anger within me. My problems mount up on the wings of eagles, and who goes out to meet them. I do. I never run from problems. I've made that decision since I can remember. I don't run. I don't hide. Being a man is facing the problem, but in me there seems to be this continual side-swipe. I stand there ready to do battle, but the man next to me punches me in the face. WTF! Wasn't that guy on my side?! There is a deep seeded feeling that whatever I do is wrong. I need help with that. ... for a few days I got so...tired of everything that I do being or feeling wrong...that I quite literally in my head said "Fuck You" to the world....It's a long road....
I can't keep doing this to myself. I really do hate myself a lot of the time. Other times I'm....no I just hate myself.
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